Blog Master G

Today’s Dilbert cracks me up. As a product manager working on use cases (or “user stories”) as I read today’s strip, I find it especially funny.

Last night Jen and I watched the premier of the WB’s new reality show, the Surreal Life, which puts 7 celebrities in a house for 10 days to live together and play together. They get to share 3 rooms. The lineup is an hilarious ensemble: MC Hammer, Emmanuel Lewis, Brande Roderick, Corey Feldman, Gabrielle Carteris, Vince Neil, and Jerri Manthey. My favorite parts of last night’s episode were hearing Manny crack himself up at everything he said, and seeing him, Corey, and Hammer get all upset about eating sushi off a naked chick while all the women and Vince dove right in. This should be a good series.

This morning I took the Scoobie in for its 13,272-mile oil change. Happy came along. We talked to this guy also waiting in the lobby who recently bought a Legacy GT. We were checking out the white WRX in the lobby and he was saying that he has buyer’s remorse for not having bought one. I’m glad I did. I have no buyer’s remorse. I love my car. I’ve now had it for 8 months and 6 days, which means I’ve driven it an average of 52.88 miles per day during each of the 251 days I’ve owned the car.

North Korean Dictator Kim Jong Il issued a statement today that his country is going to pull out of the nuclear Non-Proliferation Treaty (NPT). From the Reuters story:

Fleischer said Bush stressed in a telephone call with Jiang that “the United States has no hostile intentions toward North Korea, and sought a peaceful, multilateral solution to the problem created by Pyongyang’s action.”

Hmm…the U.S. has “no hostile intentions” toward one prong of the “Axis of Evil”? How does that work? Leave it to Bush and his war-hungry cronies to come up with rhetoric that makes no damn sense. The good thing about this move by North Korea, though, is that most folks are saying that it doesn’t really mean much, especially since the country did just this in 1994 and the situation was diffused.

This week Newsweek put Jong II on its cover, calling him Dr. Evil. So perhaps this move is all just part of his childish attention-craving ways. Maybe we should have Clonaid create a Mini Me for Jong II. Would that keep him happy for a while and delay his desire to blow up the world?

Tony Pierce cracks me up. He has this interactive photo auction, which is a series of pictures of a friend of his modeling all the clothes she currently has for sale on eBay. The idea is great, the friend’s really cute, and so far, her clothes aren’t selling too well on eBay (only 1 $3 bid for the sexy pink pleated skirt).

This is pretty cool: A Web site called All Consuming that tracks the references that blogs make to books. Here’s where my site shows up in the list, along with all my references to books on my blog.

According to this list, Stupid White Men is the 4th most-mentioned book in blogs.

In an excellent article on Salon called Road Outrage, Arianna Huffington succinctly presents how the government and American automakers are in bed preventing SUV mileage from getting any better and rewarding people to buy the biggest road hogs available. This is the part that angers me the most:

Of course, Washington continues to do its part by holding SUVs to lower fuel-efficiency and air-pollution standards than passenger cars. Our politicians have even refused to close a deeply misguided tax loophole that rewards buyers of extra-large — and extra-wasteful — SUVs with extra-large tax breaks.

Think of that: At a time when our leaders should be touting the importance of reducing our dependence on foreign oil, the people being given a financial incentive to purchase a new vehicle are those buying fuel-chugging SUVs.

“I was surprised,” said Karl Wizinsky, a healthcare consultant from Michigan who just bought a giant Ford Excursion even though he admits he doesn’t really need it, “that a $32,000 credit on a $47,000 purchase was available in the first year. I mean, it is a substantial credit.” Yes, it is. And it’s created a substantial — and artificial — demand.

Then you have folks like Dave Pell, who argues in today’s NextDraft newsletter (see Vehicular Terrorism?) that he “needs” an SUV for the leg room, the cat of all things, and, of course, the typical Bay Area resident’s excuse: The trip to Tahoe. He also takes a snapshot of some SUV mileage stats vs. those of some luxury vehicles. Good point there, Dave, but sorry, I don’t buy the legroom/cat/Tahoe excuse.

In the spirit of presenting you and others who may think you “need” an SUV with alternatives, I’ve prepared a quick snapshot (based on data from Edmunds.com) that compares the Jeep Grand Cherokee’s interior dimensions and fuel efficiency with that of two wagons: the Subaru Impreza WRX (which I happen to own) and the Volvo V70. As you’ll see, you can get nearly as much head, hip, shoulder, and luggage room in a wagon and save at least 8 miles per gallon over that which you’d get in the Cherokee. That 8 miles per gallon may not seem significant, but it’s a start. The difference could certainly be more and I believe there’s a long way to go on that front.

But consider this: That extra 8 miles per gallon amounts to a loss of 8,528 yearly miles and wasted fuel and oil that’s polluting the environment, contributing to the expansion of that giant hole in the ozone layer, and making it harder for us all to breathe (8 MPG X Cherokee’s 20.5-gallon-capacity tank X conservative estimate of 52 refills over course of a year). Considering the average driver’s commute time keeps going up (currently at 25.5 minutes per day), I think it’s safe to say that the average driver fills up at least twice per week. If that’s the case, double that yearly mileage loss to 17,056 — all due to driving an SUV over a wagon. Considering there’s a mere 19.5 gallons of fuel produced from a single barrel of oil, that’s an extra 847.67 barrels of oil that 1 Cherokee driver consumes per year more than the driver of a more fuel-efficient wagon.

SUVs vs. Wagons (Interior Dimensions & Fuel Efficiency)

And to address your points about legroom, cat capacity, and Tahoe-going excuses, Dave, please consider this:

1) I am 6 feet tall and have no problem with legroom in my WRX. My brother and several of my friends are 6-foot-5 and ride comfortably in my car.
2) I have 2 dogs weighing a total of 100 pounds. They fit comfortably in the “way back” of my WRX. That’s surely more pet that your cat.
3) I have all-wheel drive in my WRX. I don’t need chains. I’m an avid skier and go to Tahoe often. My turbo-charged 4-cylinder propels me with ease past every other truck, SUV, minivan, and sports car trekking up the hill to Tahoe. I also have better handling in the snow, ice, and sleet.

That said, I will concede to SUVs in one area: ground clearance. But how often do you drive over boulders in San Francisco or a 3-foot snow bank in Tahoe?

Of course, by virtue of living in America, we’re all guilty in one way or another of contributing to the world’s pollution problems. I considered buying a hybrid last year, but instead opted for the WRX because it better meets my wants (AWD, speed, dog capacity). But at least I’m not consuming an additional 847.67 barrels of oil this year — like the guy in that Cherokee who’s putting fuel on Bush’s fire for why we “need” to drill for oil in Alaska.

Please think twice before buying an SUV. Future generations will thank you.

SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX

A few weeks back I was surprised to hear that Jen’s friend Heather was unable to access my Web site. On Monday I submitted a story to My Subaru about how I love my WRX. I heard back from the Subaru Webmaster that he was unable to access my site. Strange, right?

So I gave him an alternate URL for the story that’s also hosted on this server. Blocked again.

This time, however, he was able to shed some light on the matter for me: My entire site is blocked by some corporate firewalls because it contains the word SEX. The posting I had sent to Subaru didn’t even contain that taboo word, but a search of my blog reveals that I have 5 other postings (make that 6 with this one!). At least my pal at Subaru had a sense of humor about the whole thing: “Someone in your message or link or something, it is picking up the word ‘SEX.’ And we all know how sex is bad!!”

You can say that again. Evil sex. Bad sex. Not on my Web site. Never! Fuck that, yo. Down with free speech.

SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX

It would seem that just about every merchant faces a post-holiday lull. A bunch of fancy San Francisco restaurants are getting on board the promo band wagon and offering the Dine About Town special in conjunction with Open Table and Visa. For those of you in the Bay Area, be sure to check this out and make your reservations before the end of the month.

Jen and I have been wanting to check out bacar, so this $29.95 for 3 courses deal seems as good an excuse as any to eat there. It’s been a while since we’ve enjoyed fine dining anyway.

(Thanks, Dad, for the tip.)

In Monday’s press briefing by Ari Fleischer, it’s good to read that he got drilled hard on Iraq by Helen Thomas. You go, Helen!